Are you tired of your pets just being happy all the time? Sometimes, our furry friends who are just too darn tired of life. These pets have had enough of your constant demands for cuddles, feeding them on time, and playing with them. Lets look into the crankiest of cats, the grumpiest of dogs, and the surliest of small animals.

Grumpy Pets

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This Dog Figured Out How To Buy Treats On His Own

This pooch is one smart cookie. In Monterrey, Colombia a black dog has been living on Colombia’s Diversified Technical Education Institute of Monterrey Casanare campus, but he’s not your average mutt. It might have been the exposure to the educational system, or maybe he’s just fiscally responsible but “Negro” the dog has figured out how to buy treats on his own.

Loki the Sphinx Cat is Hella Terrifying But Actually Quite Sweet

Dear readers of Celebrity Pets, prepare to panic. Loki the Cat @loki_the_sphynx is an absolutely terrifying spawn of Satan hailing from the depths of hell. Or, as some call it, Brooklyn.

Expert Escape Artist Pepper the Cat Finally Apprehended in JFK Airport

Pepper, the feline reincarnation of Houdini, was finally found in JFK’s sprawling terminal 4 after escaping on April 20th. The cat spent a full week cruising dusty alcoves in the airport, eluding Port Authority police. Pepper’s owner missed a flight to China attempting to find her cat but had to board her re-scheduled flight.

Goose Hates Golf, Attacks Local Teen in Rage

A Canadian goose decided to take vengeance against teens and golf alike during a Michigan high school golf tournament. Isaac Couling, a 16-year-old sophomore, had just finished teeing off the seventh hole and was walking down the fairway when the vicious sneak attack occurred. Luckily, the teen was not alone.

Dog Misdiagnosed with Cancer but Actually Just Loves Eating Teddy Bears

Maisy is a St Bernard with a penchant for eating things she shouldn’t. Like any worried mother, Jane Dickinson rushed Maisy to the vet when she realized something was wrong with her 8-year-old fur baby. Following a CT scan by vet Nick Blackburn of Paragon Veterinary Referrals, Maisy was diagnosed with cancer.

Green Haired Turtle Breathes Through His Junk & Is More Punk Than You

Iggy Pop ain’t got nothin’ on this sea creature. The Mary River Turtle sports a green mohawk made of algae, two protruding spikes from its chin, and an ability to breath air through its genitals. This turtle is more Joey Ramone than Joey Ramone.

Cow Escapes Slaughterhouse, Breaks Farmers Arm, Smashes Through Metal Fence, and Escapes by Swimming to an Abandoned Island

Even the cows in Poland are tough as nails. One badass bovine decided to take matters into her own hooves after finding out she was destined for the slaughterhouse. Her farmer tried to warn the transport crew that they would need to sedate the furious cow before loading her into the truck.

Rascal Wild Has a Nose You Must Boop

Rascal “it’s a trap” Wild @rascal_wild is a rescue cat who loves mischief. He’s a tuxedo cat with the heart of a troublemaker and the nose of a gentleman – much like his namesake. Rascal began his life as a stray, cruisin’ the mean streets of Marysville, Washington.

Bald Eagle Lands on Pitcher James Paxton During Major Leagues Game

During the American national anthem, a bald eagle decided to land on major league Mariners pitcher James Paxton’s shoulder. Is there any sentence more steeped in stars and stripes than that? James Paxton was minding his own business during the American national anthem when suddenly a bald eagle decided he looks like a great perch.

Lifetime Hotel Ban Due To Pepperoni Seagull Debauchery Lifted After 17 Years

17 years ago Nick Burchill made the mistake of leaving his hotel room window open. What followed was a string of unfortunate events earning him to a lifetime ban from The Empress Hotel in Victoria, BC. Nick Burchill is a simple man from Nova Scotia.